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7 Years Ago: The Loss

A Word to Inspire…

A Word to Inspire

October 17, 2023

The losses should have broken her seven years ago. Her marriage of three in covenant now had multiple unknown partners. So much for the marriage bed being undefiled!

She didn’t want to believe it at first, but then her youngest would play out the conversation in his private play, which no child his age should be able to imagine.  

The nail in the coffin was a casual conversation with the godfather of their children. Not a usual one; they held each other’s confidence when frustrated temporarily at their spouse. She stated, “She feels as if she’s now the mistress or the concubine!”.

She wasn’t asking a question or fishing for answers, just expressing her raw emotions to a person she considered a friend and believed she was safe. Such a simple exhale created a dynamic shift that forever changed their relationship.  

Though she met him and the man who later became her husband the same night, they were frat brothers and best friends. His loyalty was challenged between the two; the chips didn’t land on her side. His immediate silence told it all. 

Remember, the marriage initially contained three; she never walked away from Yahweh; if anything, she cleaved even closer to him. Accustomed to seeking clarity and direction from Yahweh, she sought guidance for the questions and doubts that plagued her. No, she didn’t ask for harm to befall him, even if a couple of Waiting to Exhale or Tyler Perry’s infamous clips crossed her mind. Yet she did ask for her to be medically and physically protected. If her thoughts were correct, his ability toward her would be no. 

The accusation against her in response to his lack of performance was true, for Yahweh revealed the answers she sought. She realized, in hindsight, that her prayer should have included mental protection from the cruelty of his words. His reasoning had nothing to do with her but revealed just how vile he became towards her. 

Yet she trusts Yahweh…

The helmet of salvation protects our minds from the fiery words aimed to kill us mentally. However, if we repeat those words in any other form than a rebuke, we give them credence and allow them to take root in our psyche.

~~~~~~~~~

All while her marriage was falling apart, she had to accept the care for her oldest was beyond her ability. Her firstborn, the child she prayed for, the child that removed the Mother’s Day reproach from her after six years of marriage and a miscarriage. Now, she wasn’t an afterthought on that day, for she gave her husband, who she believed loved her, a child as well.  

She always stated she had to say the Hannah prayer to have a child. She never knew she would have to find a ‘House of Eli’ to raise him. 

We often repeat prayers from the Bible without understanding the full implications of what they mean. She promised that he would be raised unto Yahweh. She would raise Him to be a mighty man of valor. But Yahweh’s ways are not our own, nor are His thoughts equivalent to ours. So now her prayer was for Yahweh to direct her to the residential school that would watch and care for her child as if she would. For Yahweh to strengthen her heart and resolve to do what is suitable for her child whom Yahweh has entrusted her with for ten years, and for her to mentally, physically, and spiritually return her firstborn care to his Heavenly Father to raise him.

Yet she trusts Yahweh…

She was led to a residential school, where her son would now be under the direct care of Yahweh, cared for by others. The first home he placed in is called the Cedar House. Cedar wood is known for its protection and strength. The second home has been the Sycamore House, also known for its safety and power, but also for transformation.

The divorce has been settled, but the ink is still wet. Yet life for him continued as nothing changed and the unknown became known. 

Her youngest and she returned to her family home. Only Yahweh could have orchestrated dead bones reviving during the previous year’s Resurrection season.  

Finally, could the bleeding stop? Could healing now begin? 

Yahweh brought her back home, so now she can rebuild, reset, raise her son, and start fresh. Or can she?

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

Jeremiah 29:11